Category: Inner Life Coaching

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Author your life: make choices for authentic relationships

author your life, authentic relationships, authentic people, authentic person, authentic self

With so much talk about living authentically, we seem to have forgotten the origin of the word “authentic”. Etymologically, it derives from “one acting on one’s authority” – from the reflexive “auto” – self, one’s own, by oneself, of oneself. If authentic, you author your life, acting on your authority. 

On the other hand, most of us get stuck trying to find our way back to “our authentic self” – as if there were some original, static version of self that we could find and refer to.

If only I were true to that version of me, I would be authentic!

Continue reading Author your life: make choices for authentic relationships

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Hyper-independence makes you miserable: ask for better support

hyper-independence, independent, interdependence, support network,

I grew up in the eighties and nineties when “girls can do anything” was our everyday motto. This strong drive for independent women had shaped so many facets of my life that I failed to notice when I crossed the line from an independent woman into hyper-independence.

I struggle to ask for help.

Worse yet, I fail to accept support and connection from others and then will be the first to complain, “why do I have to do everything myself?”.

Hyper-independence is not a virtue. It may look like one of my strengths, but it is my Achilles heel.  Continue reading Hyper-independence makes you miserable: ask for better support

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Make life better: how to live abundantly and authentically

abundance, abundantly, achievements, achieving your goals, alignment, authentically you, authenticity, build a life, build new relationships, career and professional changes, choices, clarifying your goals, compassion, connection, courage, create a lifestyle you love, create the life you want, creativity, decision-making process, define and maintain success, describe your ideal life, emotion, emotional intelligence, expectations, finances, financial security when you follow your heart, fundamentals of success, goal setting, health, how to plan your goals, know thyself, maintaining success, professional activities, reassess goals, relationships change, resources and assets, self-awareness, studies, values, well-being, wellbeing is an inside job, wellness, wisdom, make life better,

If you wanted to make life better, where would you start?

I recently listened to Ken Honda and Lewis Howes talk about abundance. Ken Honda made a fascinating observation on assets: tangible versus intangible.

This applies to your measurement of success as to your measure of wealth and abundance. What intangibles allow you to say that you are wealthy and successful?

  • great health and energy
  • wonderful family relationships
  • fun, adventures and hobbies
  • self-image and confidence
  • spiritual growth and wellbeing
  • personal achievements

What are your measurements of abundance and success? Are they an authentic reflection of everything you want in your life? Continue reading Make life better: how to live abundantly and authentically

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How stress, fear and anxiety rob us of the ability to make good decisions

stress, fear, anxiety, mental state, calm, relaxed, emotional state, physiological, make good decisions, decision-making ability, balanced breathing, digestion, gut instinct, self-awareness, mindfulness, brain dump, journaling, morning pages, commitment, self-compassion, acceptance, letting go, cybernetic loop, connection, inner circle, feelings, desires, values, priorities, connection, perspective, brainstorming, planning, obstacles, challenges, personal identity, safety and security, risk, courageous, fight, flight, freeze, fatigue, irritable, flow state

While the news media is only partly to blame, making a killing of FUDGE (fear, uncertainty, doubt, greed, and envy), they are not the sole culprits. We live in a world where fear, stress, and anxiety are normalised. Each one of us chooses, on some level, to play this game. Or at least, we pretend that we have no other choices.

But, how do we make good decisions from a state of fear, stress and anxiety? In many ways, we’re hampered by tunnel vision, unable to see options broader than the scope of escaping the immediate threats that we perceive. We move towards safety rather than seeing the broader opportunities available to us. Continue reading How stress, fear and anxiety rob us of the ability to make good decisions

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Accountability: how to get better results

accountability, how to get better results, set goals, goal setting, vision board, habits, daily practices, what is accountability, why you need accountability, who are you accountable to, what are you accountable for, facing your excuses, monkey mind, shiny object syndrome, challenges and obstacles, procrastination, facing your fears, self discipline, creating new habits, accountability buddy, mentoring, coaching, inner life coach, performance coaching, career coaching, personal development, mindset

Last year I trialled a new coaching program with clients for Ditch the Diet & Face the Feelings. It gave clients the option of three 20-minute accountability calls each week rather than one weekly coaching call.  The results from it were astounding for those clients used to dieting and weekly weigh-ins.

Why?

Because the weekly accountability calls enable them to fudge the process as they would with a diet: to follow it only for the two or three days before the call, rather than living the process every day of the week. Continue reading Accountability: how to get better results